I remember when you were so tiny… I was afraid to touch you. I thought you might just break. Now… you are into everything.. Testing all boundaries.. Climbing.. Crawling…falling.. Repeat.
I remember your very first smile… and now your whole face lights up at just the sight of your daddy and brother… every single time.
I remember rocking you to sleep… just staring at you… so thankful that you were okay after our scare… listening to every single breath to reassure myself that your lungs were okay. Now as I rock you to sleep you sing along with me… until you pass out. This is by far… my most favorite thing with you in this moment. Your adorable little voice cooing away with the song… smiling… eyes closed. I constantly tell my brain to capture this moment… don’t let this one go. I want to remember this … forever.
I remember your eyes darting about following your brother… your legs kicking in delight… wanting to chase him at just a month old. Now… wherever he goes… you go. He runs… you rapidly crawl squealing with delight.
I remember watching you… wondering what this would all be like months down the road… and now I watch you… and I can almost see your mind thinking… testing your boundaries… trying to stand on your own. You pull up on the couch… do a couple of bounces… then a slight smile… as you slowly let go… squealing in delight for that few seconds you stand without falling… and then splat… flat on your bottom…. Still smiling. So proud of yourself… and then you repeat this for at least 30 minutes a night :)
I remember Maddux… constantly asking “when can he play with me” and I would reply soon. I am so thankful that soon is here. You love playing swords with your brother. I am not quite sure you know what is all going on. But you hold onto that sword with a death grip and laugh uncontrollably as your brother dances around you… lightly tapping his sword on yours.
I remember your first giggle… the first time you sat… the first time you pulled up to stand. And it feels like this time is just flying by us.
I remember your first experience with baby food… and then once I introduced you to food you can pick up and feed yourself.. How now you have dismissed anything that comes by spoon. Which is limiting us in what we have given you. You stubborn little foodie.
I remember bringing Charlie home… and how she immediately claimed you as her boy. And I am looking forward to the two of you growing up together…. Wondering what adventures you two will have. And I am thankful that both of my boys have a dog that means the world to them. A dog that curls up with them and naps … Nala with Maddux… and Charlie with you. However, she is still just a pup… so she does not have freedom at night… but I know that soon enough… the two of you will be sharing a bed… just like the other two.
I remember the first time you found your hands… the look on your face… of such a discovery. Now those tiny hands are into everything. Constantly pulling things out of drawers… pulling up on anything they can grab… pulling hair… Momma’s hair constantly :)
I remember your first word. Dada. I love the bond between you and your dad… he is definitely your most favorite person on this planet. And I love watching your face just light up when he walks through the door.
I remember the first time you clapped your hands… or gave me an open-mouthed drool kiss. And with each sloppy kiss… you just giggle more and more.
With all of these firsts… you being my last baby… I also find myself focusing on the lasts….The last first giggle. The last gummy smile. The last bottle. And I could go on and on and on.
The firsts are exciting and fun but with each first… I am reminded it is also my last. Slow down sweet boy… Momma’s not ready to move this fast. Let’s take our time… and enjoy ever last-minute .