You turned six months over the weekend and as we sit here tonight… I am just taking you in. Trying to take a mental snapshot of every tiny detail in this moment as you fell asleep next to me. These memories right here are one sided. I will house these memories… however you will have no recollection of any of this. These tiny moments… these life changing… tiny moments.
I’ll always remember the day you were born. The scariest 72 hours of my life. How tiny you were… so tiny I was afraid to hold you. All the tiny tubes and wires they had on your tiny 6 lb body. The struggling breath… the cries… and nothing I could do to fix it… feeling small and helpless… and trying to keep it together for the both of us.. And failing repeatedly.
I’ll always remember the names of the two nurses that took care of you and consoled me on my worst nights when it was just me and you…. And they could tell I needed just a few kind words.
I’ll always remember the first day your brother got to see you through the glass. Him bouncing up and down with excitement… exclaiming “he’s soooo cute!” Face smooshed against the glass beaming ear to ear.
I’ll always remember the first day we got to take you home. How crazy your dad thought I was for making us go back to the ER … just to make sure your lungs were fine because I thought you were wheezing in your sleep (turns out he was right… I was being worried for nothing) But then also how he sweetly said… I am glad we came, its better to know for sure… even though he was lying :)
I’ll always remember that first week you were home. You were napping next to me on the couch… Nala hopped up gave you a sniff and then very softly laid right beside you.
I’ll always remember the little old turtle look you had for a few months. You would make the “O” shape with your lips and stretch out your neck and wrinkle up your forward. I laughed every time because you looked just like that cartoon on Loony Tunes.
I’ll always remember your first trip to Disney for you…. You slept through most of it. Actually pretty much all of it. You loved the heat. I was so worried about you being in Florida in the summer… and you loved it. I’ll always remember your first ride – Winnie the Pooh. All the shapes and colors had your eyeballs popping right out of your head. You were amazed.
I’ll always remember your first smile… your eyes lighting up…. Dancing. You have one of the best smiles I have ever seen.
I’ll always remember the first time you rolled over. Which was immediately followed by a shriek cry… completely confused on what the heck happened.
I’ll always remember how your eyes followed Maddux’s every movement. You are in complete awe over him … you just smile from ear to ear when he talks to you… and the bond that is beginning is incredible for a mom to watch.
I’ll always remember your first time in the pool. The confusion on your face. No crying at all. But a very concerned look… which did not disappear until I brought you back inside.
I’ll always remember the pure delight on your face when you realize we are going to change your diaper. And then how once the diaper is off you arch your back and try to make it so a new one cannot be put on. I already see a streaking toddler in my future.
I’ll always remember how you spit out almost every single vegetable. I never believed people who said their babies were picky eaters… and once again… karma was served. I was given a ridiculously picky eater :)
I’ll always remember how infatuated you were with your feet. The moment I lie you on your back… you swing up those chunky little legs… and that foot goes right into your mouth.
I’ll always remember the baby talk… the coos and the giggles… and the sneezes followed by laughter. I’ll always remember how as I rock and sing to you… you coo back in return. I’ll always remember how you love to let out a squeal and crack up when I return it. (this came can go on forever… it’s one of your favorites… and has me cracking up every single time)
I promise to always lock away these memories. I’ll record them, photograph them, write about them. I’ll be your memory keeper… and these small tiny moments are the best… most life changing moments I will never forget…
I love watching your personality develop sweet boy. You are the most easy going baby… always happy… always smiling… you are such a joy to be around. I look forward to experiencing years and years upon firsts with you. Happy half birthday our little Huddy Buddy!